Ten Actresses that make me cringe in 2013
With the guys out of the way, I can now turn my attentions to the fairer sex. Women have it harder than guys do in Hollywood as they are judged more heavily. It doesn’t mean they have to be annoying though. These 10 women constantly have people rolling their eyes at their acting skills, hating the romantic comedy genre, and they just repel the public with their off screen antics. It isn’t too hard to be a straight up B these days. Congrats ladies, you are on the TBizzy cringe list!
What did I base my criteria of hate on? Here are the factors.
1) Look or appearance.
2) Off screen interviews and personality.
3) Their acting ability.
4) The quality of the movies they show up in, both past and present.
5) The total volume of their work.
6) If they will ever show up on a Moped and totally redeem themselves. (Redemption quality)
TOP 10 ACTRESSES I HATE TO SEE IN FILMS FOR 2013
#10 Jennifer Carpenter
We start off this list the same way we started off the guys list. Much like David Koechener, Carpenter does not have the ability to speak normally. When she is not distracting people with her strange delivery, she can be seen detracting from the movies shes in, like Quarantine, and White Chicks. She also can be found, irritating the shit out of watchers on the TV show Dexter. There is a reason she was so good in the Exorcism of Emily Rose, that is because she looks like she could be used as an effective scarecrow on most farms. She is irritating to look at, and she is irritating to listen to. She only has a small movie resume, so she starts off the list for cringe worthy actresses in 2013.
#9 Paris Hilton
The world has mostly forgotten about Paris Hilton, but the movie Hottie & the Nottie was so bad that she has made this list 5 years after that films release. She is famous for doing cocaine and showing up to parties. If that is the criteria for being a celebrity, then I should be the king of a small country by now. If you stare at her long enough, she starts to look like Wayne Gretzky in makeup. When a sex tape is the best acting role you have produced, it is time to give up the acting dream. Miss Hilton is a Hottie that no one in this world misses, and she finds herself at number 9 on my list.
#8 Lea Michele
Lea Michele just bothers me for some reason. She has a killer voice and an obnoxious demeanor. It might not be entirely her fault, because I feel Hollywood is forcing her on us in unwanted amounts. But when you stand out as the weak link in a movie like New Years Eve, it says something about your acting skills. She has limited screen time on her resume, and she could turn it around if she was cast in better roles. Alas, we are stuck with her for now and she is as irritating as a Glee storyline. At number 8, Lea is a singing nightmare.
#7 Michelle Trachtenberg
Michelle somehow reached Hollywood stardom, and then let it get to her head. I have hated Michelle since her Buffy the Vampire days and that feeling has never gone away. With less than stellar movies, like EuroTrip and Black Christmas on her resume, she has retreated back to TV where she belongs. She is portrayed as a sex symbol and yet she wouldn’t stand out in most high schools. Let us hope she simply fades away, because she is hard to watch. At number 7, Trachtenberg is slaying us with her awfulness.
#6 Reese Witherspoon
With a chin like a mini Jay Leno, Witherspoon likes to ruin her audiences evening, by making you watch the same movie, over and over and over. This Means War, How Do you Know, Four Christmases, and Legally Blonde 2. Way to test your acting range and ruin most guys nights at the same time. Now we find out that she turns into Ed Belfour when her husband is pulled over by the cops for a suspected DUI. “Do you know who I am?” she is quoted as saying. The only appropriate answer to that question is, MOVIE DATE NIGHT KILLER. With an Oscar on her resume and a kick ass voice to boot, it is a shame she doesn’t pursue the singing avenue. Reese has a small stature, but is a huge fun repellant.
#5 Kirsten Dunst
I listened to her talk about the Spiderman movies and instantly I disliked Dunst. She speaks as if she was an integral part to the film’s success, instead of a character that could have been played by 30 different actresses. Yes, you are talented because you don’t wear a bra while it is raining. She has been boring audiences with her jacked up smile for a long time now, and there is no end in sight. Must we sit through more god awful films like Wimbledon, just so we can hear her spout nonsense about how good an actress she is? We wish she was permanently young, like in the movie Interview With the Vampire, so we wouldn’t have to witness her act as an adult.
#4 Wanda Sykes
Wanda Sykes wears the other half of the amulet that Ben Stiller carries. Nothing can make me change a channel faster than seeing Wanda Sykes is in the movie. With a face that looks like it was punched by Mike Tyson, and a voice that makes Mila Kunis’s sound smooth, Sykes has been delivering the lowest forms of comedy for way too long. She was in the movie Pootie Tang. End of story.
#3 Gwyneth Paltrow
Dame Gwyneth Paltrow offers the world advice, and she expects the world to listen. There is something so off putting about the woman that it carries over to her films. She just seems so stuck up in everything she says and does. When she is not bettering the world with her, I am holier than thou attitude, she can be found making instant movie classics like, View From the Top. All I can say is that Kevin Spacey got it right.
#2 Kristen Stewart
Kristen is easy to pick on, so I will make this short. Twilight, She cannot close her mouth, and her the world isn’t fair attitude, all lend to her lack of appeal. My nephew once broke a GI Joe toy of mine, and I am not ashamed to say I shed one single tear in sadness. That was more emotion than anything that Stewart has shown to us in her films. She will be on this list for a long time, as she just grates on the viewer’s nerves with her unemotional delivery.
#1 Katherine Heigl
With a mouth sporting 72 teeth, Heigl has ruined more guys nights than any other actress out there. If she hears the word, Rom Com, she instantly signs up to star in it without reading the script. I would call her acting cookie cutterish, but that would insult cookie cutters. New Years Eve, The Ringer, 27 Dresses, The Ugly Truth, Life as We Know It, she has probably caused thousands of fights between couples because of her movies. She wasn’t even enjoyable in the movie Knocked Up, and that is hard to do. Take a bow Miss Heigl, it is not easy to be number 1 on the cringe list, but you easily do it.
Honorable mentions that almost made my list were: Amy Poehler, Lindsay Lohan, Penelope Cruz, Hillary Swank, and Jennifer Lopez.
So do you agree with my list? Do you have someone to add or someone you want to defend?
Remember these lists are just for fun and are not to be taken too seriously. Let me know what you think!