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Movie rating system (0-2) The movie is balls (2-4) A few moments but mostly bad (4-5.5) Entertaining film but lacking something to make it good. (6-7.5) A recommendation meaning a good solid watch. (8-10) must watch films, they are usually leaders in their respective genre. I can also be found on Facebook or follow my blog at the bottom of this page. THERE MAY BE MINI SPOILERS AHEAD!!! But there will be no endings/twists/cameos/or large plot reveals given.

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Tuesday, 7 August 2012


Drama (Sci Fi)
Rated: R
Running Time: 94 minutes
Starring: Scoot McNairy, Whitney Able
Directed By: Gareth Edwards
Rating: 1.5 out of 10
A couple must make their way home through alien infested land.

The formula for a good monster movie is pretty straight forward. Cool looking monster + wanton destruction and or killing = a good time. There for it shocks me that so many monster movies get it wrong. This movie gets a failing grade in math as it used the formula, No monster + No killing or wanton destruction = A terrible film. Monsters, is the story of an alien invasion that has a huge part of Mexico fenced off to keep the monsters at bay.  Andrew a photographer has agreed to escort Samantha through the alien zone to get her home to her family in the States. The only thing stopping them from reaching their goal is many miles of harsh terrain and giant squid like monsters.

A brief opening scene where the US army battles against these unknown invaders is just a cool tease. That is because from the end of the opening scene virtually nothing happens. It is amazing to me that they named this movie Monsters when you never really get to see any of the beasts. The films slow dramatic plotline will literally have you trying to stay awake. Andrew and Samantha journey across country to get home and the viewer could care less. The film seems to be building to a scene of epic proportions and frustratingly it never arrives.

Andrew played by Scoot McNairy and Amanda played by Whitney Able are actually portrayed very well. They seem tired and strung out from the stresses of travelling through frightening unknown territory. They are believable in their roles and the sexual undertones between them seem very realistic. That being said, because the movie is so uneventful the performances are lost in the mix.

When you do get to glimpse the Monsters you get to see they are well designed and formed. That's what is so devastating about this film is the potential for greatness is there. At the end of the day there is too much wasted film watching and boring dialogue for a film of this nature. It tries to suck you into the story with tons of character development and a non linear story line but trust me it doesn’t remotely work. I am not sure if budget restraints ruined this film but I found Kathy Bates in the About Schmidt hot tub scene a hell of a lot scarier than this film.

Director and writer Gareth Edwards put together a puzzling film of epic boredom. When I think I could have done a better job shooting this film you know you are in trouble. The script was terrible and the cinematography was awful in all the key moments. The casting and creature design was there but the action sequences and interesting plot was not. It was just a terrible job from basically the start to finish in this film.

I cannot recommend this film as it was more of a monstrosity then a film about monsters.

T Factor + If you like lots of dialogue in your movies this could score higher on the rating scale.

T Factor – If you like lots of action in your movies than this could score lower on the rating scale.

If you liked this film reel recommendations: The Mist, District 9

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