John Carter
Action (Sci-Fi, Aliens)
2012
Rated: PG-13
Running Time: 132 minutes
Starring: Taylor Kitsch,
Lynn Collins, Samantha Morton, Mark Strong, Dominic West, Thomas Haden Church,
Ciaran Hinds, Bryan Cranston
Directed By: Andrew
Stanton
Rating: 5 out of 10
Outline
A Civil War vet is accidentally
transported to Mars. He must survive the planets hostile inhabitants and try
and find a way back to Earth.
Review
So I heard the internet
chatter of how bad this movie is and what a colossal bomb it was at the box
office. While it did fail horribly at the box office it wasn’t as bad as
people made it out to be. Sure it has a multitude of problems which I will
discuss in detail but I was entertained by this film if not enamored by it. It
suffered the same fate as Waterworld and the Adventures of Pluto Nash….well
mainly Waterworld. That fate is a bunch of people hating on the movie before
they have even seen it. Waterworld and Adventures of Pluto Nash were not great
movies but they were panned unfairly because they did not do well at the
box office. I say stop being movie lemmings people and have an original thought
once in a while. John Carter is the story of a Civil War vet who gets
transported to Mars and finds himself in the middle of a battle for that
planets domination. He must chose sides as he tries to figure out a way back to
his home planet.
So I will start with what
I liked about the film. I felt the story was nothing amazing but it was easy to
follow and kept me entertained for the whole film. The alien races on Mars
were well thought up and visually impressive. Especially a group of aliens
called the Tharks. They were the coolest thing about this film. Their green
skin, huge stature, four arms, and nomadic warrior lifestyle were perfect for
the harsh conditions on Mars. They reminded me of General Grievous from Star
Wars in a way (that is a good thing). The action while coming at sporadic
intervals was enough to keep me sated. Futuristic flying ships and lasers are
intertwined perfectly with medieval weapons such as spears and swords. I was
also invested in John Carter’s struggle of surviving on this strange world and
his attempt to make it back to Earth. So as you can see there are a lot of
things to enjoy about this movie if you can keep an open mind. Also on a side
note, I cannot fault them for trying to go for a film very akin to Star Wars.
There are many amazing Sci-Fi stories out there that can share a place beside
the holy trilogy.
The acting is average in
this film but passable for the most part. John Carter is played by the will he
ever get another lead role Taylor Kitsch. 2012 was supposed to be Kitsch’s big
year as he starred in two other films (Battleship, Savages.) His films lost
well in excess of a hundred million dollars so he will be treated like he has
the plague for a long time. He isn’t bad in John Carter but he seems to be
trying a little too hard at times. Couple that with the fact he looks like a
young Stephen Dorff and excellence does not lean in his favor. He was okay in
the role but needs to polish up his delivery in the future. His leading lady, the princess Dejah Thoris is played by Lynn Collins. She is okay but mostly forgettable
as a warrior princess. She is beautiful though so she has the look of a
princess and that is a good thing. The bad aliens are played by Mark Strong and
Dominic West. I like Strong and West as actors but they are cast as these
generic evil villains that are rather bland, so it is disappointing performance
from them. The voices of the aliens are spot on. Familiar voices such as Willem
Dafoe, Samantha Morton, Thomas Haden Church, and many others were well matched
to their respective alien characters.
Now to the bad parts of
the film and why it ultimately fell short. I am unfamiliar with the book
written by Edward Rice Burroughs that this movie is based on so I am speaking purely
from a movie standpoint. (as to not offend any Sci-Fi geeks out there.) First
off the title of this film is terrible and possibly one of the worst ever. It
obviously has no bearing on the movies quality but what were they thinking?
The film clearly suffers from Star Wars: The Phantom Menace syndrome. It is
trying to cater to way too many key audience demographics and it gets sloppy.
Stupid things like dogs that can run hundreds of miles an hour, John Carter can
leap huge distances (he should have been able to fly if they were going to go
with this angle.), flying space skiffs, and many other strange things seem too
childish for a film like this. The action also is rather tame and underwhelming
at times for a film of such a high budget (Est. 250 million.) People need high impact
when the story is so drawn out and it was never forthcoming. Lastly the story
seems jumbled together. Themes of religion, old hatreds, and unexplained alien
rituals all seem forced upon the viewer without much thought to the outcome. Because the film had such lack of focus it just didn’t seem
right even though it was easy to watch.
Director Andrew Stanton
undeniably knows how to shoot animated films (Finding Nemo, Wall E) and he
should stick to that format. He is what made this film not succeed in my mind.
It is clear he was trying to appeal to the masses. A style which animated films
are known for and it was a glaring failure. John Carter bounced around this movie
like a super ball and it got harder to watch as the movie went along. Suspect
characters, cheesy love story, and underutilized generic bad guys. This film
had no clear direction. Big budgets can make up for a lot of things but cannot
cover up bad decisions. Stick to animated movies Mr. Stanton where you are at
the top of your game.
I cannot recommend this
film as it has way too many things going on to be enjoyed properly.
T Factor + If you like Sci-Fi then this could score
higher on the rating scale.
T Factor – If you do not like Taylor Kitsch as an
actor this could score lower on the rating scale.
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